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I’ve been avoiding wordpress for a while so as not to spread negative energy. From my previous posts, it’s been over 2 months now that I’ve been really low. Yes there are highs, that don’t last more than a few hours. At the point of wondering why I’m alive while nothing in my white room moves except for the clock, the electric fan, my eyeballs and my breathing, I thought of seeking treatment already. Okay, enough.

Well, writing is therapeutic. So what else works in making me feel momentarily okay ..  That day when I accidentally met TM at McDo, where we used to meet up before taking off to the Enchanted Farm. French interns. The university where I and Trech last talked to a bunch of students (I miss public speaking). Alma mater and it’s usual accommodation and efficiency. I remember when I was broken there, I got fine, now I’m broken so maybe I’ll be fine again. That day when I admitted that I am not a victim of circumstances, and I enjoyed my choices, to the bit. 

And since my “truths” change before I can put them in words, I’ll just say it’s fleetingmust not hold on to it.

understanding the soul

During bouts of melancholy, the outer life may look empty; but at the same time, inner work may be taking place at full speed. -freud

Sitting through this, will never have to look back.

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